Turning an ugly duckling into a swan

Hey everyone so my next post is going to get a little deep so bear with me. My assignment was, in blantant terms, to use five songs that represent your life. So my plan is to take you through a little journey on how I became the adorable loving electronic Shannen that you have come to know and love today.

1) The first song that immediately came to mind when I was given this assignment was “Set The Fire To The Third Bar” by Snow Patrol.  I love yet hate this song because it reminds me of a time in my life, specifically 11th grade, where I was confused about who I was. I didn’t know how to find myself and I felt, as Snow Patrol says “miles from where you are.” I love this song because it sends shivers down my spine with its lyrics and haunting melodies and I hate it because it brings back really awful memories about that place and time where I hated who I was and in plain terms, hit rock bottom.

2) By now, I bet your wondering what was this horrible, disasterous thing that made her hit bottom right? Well, let’s go down the list; I developed an eating disorder, got diagnosed with depression and anxiety. So basically, I was the classic ‘angsty’ teenager that every parent tries to avoid. Needless to say my mom was freaked out which landed me in therapy and major parental lockdown for two years.

“Mad World” by Gary Jules aka, the most depressing song on my iPod, is the perfect song to basically restate everything I said above. I was just so… lost, and this song is the perfect way to represent it. I was just living in a world where nothing made sense and this song is about how people just float along life…watching.

3) I know it sounds like I’m joking about this whole thing, but seriously, it sucked so much feeling trapped inside something that I couldn’t get out of. Eventually, after two years of battling my diseases, I managed to pull myself out of the darkest days of my life, and I began to live my life again.

However, I did it very carefully. I didn’t talk about what I went through and I had walls up all around me. “Colorblind” by Counting Crows is about how you have to put yourself out there again after bad things happen to you…and that’s what I did. I took a deep breath and put myself out there again.

4) Summer of senior year came and I was starting new again. I was getting ready for college, starting fresh. I was basically a new person. Granted, I still had demons I was fighting everyday but damn, I felt amazing. “Rise” by Eddie Vedder comes from my favorite movie, “Into The Wild.” It’s just a happy, feel good song that says learn from your mistakes and basically rise from them and become stronger and smarter from them. Your mistakes are what make you who you are.

Gonna rise up
Burning black holes in dark memories
Gonna rise up
Turning mistakes into gold

5) Time to quit all the emotional crap and get to something fun because I think I deserve to have some fun after all of the above right?

 “Forget You” by Cee Lo Green is so much fun to jam out to on long road trips. Whenever this song comes on the radio, I immediately forget all of my problems and start singing. I love it when a song does that because it means that that song really is able to wash away your worries.


About sksks1

I've learned how important it is to not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong
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2 Responses to Turning an ugly duckling into a swan

  1. Rosemary Armao says:

    The last one is a song you like but it’s not really part of your soundtrack. Since the minimum assignment was three, that’s ok. You used the throw-away well. Good job of revealing — but not too much and the songs do fit together as you describe them.

    You need commas. They help readers get through what you saying, particularly if you are speaking/writing to them conversationally Look, for example, at your first sentence. It should be punctuated like this: Hey, everyone! So my next post is going to get a little deep, so bear with me.

    And you use the word “so” too much, including twice in the above sentence.


  2. MickieAmber says:

    I love this, and can relate more than you even know! Apart from your previous commentator, I’m not observing and/or critiquing your writing style, nor your grammatical errors. I’m looking at the emotional attachment and investment in your writing, and I appreciate the heartfelt and vulnerability you incorporated into your writing.
    Simply put, I love it.

    Good job,

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